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| Offa's Dyke Finger Post |
In our trekking lives we've come to count on a litany of trail blazes, mile markers and finger posts to help confirm our place on the map, the trail and toward our destinations. Where are we (exactly)? What's the nature of the trail ahead? And often -- in the voice of our eight-year-old inner children -- Are we there yet?
The Unexpected Journey reliably has been bereft of such helpful information. In the past 16 months we've learned the Unexpected Journey follows a path of unpredictability ruled by all that is unpredictable about cancer and its treatments. No two days are the same. Drug side effects can include all or nothing on a prescription info sheet -- hailing, as well, on any timeline (for example, usually skin issues show up early in the use of Panitimumab -- mine waited seven months). Tumors can grow when markers are undetectable. Neuropathy may or may not subside (oh, to feel my toes again!). Our consistency resides in using our experiences (whatever they may be) to strengthen our resolve, refine our focus and remind us of what we really can accomplish (have accomplished).
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| It can be difficult to know where one stands on the Unexpected Journey |
We accept that cancer does not follow the relative ease and efficiency of switchbacks. Rather it is determined to lead us through the least hospitable of terrains -- and usually straight uphill. Leaving us better prepared -- though perhaps quite spent -- for the next tough ascent. In fact, we think cancer may have some Kiwi (New Zealander) leanings as we seem to be destined to slog determinedly through every gosh-darned mud hole and field of sheep shit in the realm! But we've done it -- so we know we can! Managing expectations and adjusting to a life of open curiosity has been our best approach. Every moment, we are in the moment -- all else is unknowable. And still, that little voice wafts in from the back seat (you remember), "Are we there yet?"
And oh my gosh -- miracle of miracles -- last Friday it felt like we finally got a sign!
As you recall from my previous posts, over the last two months I've undergone two procedures: Trans-arterial Chemo Embolization (Oct) and Microwave Ablation (Nov). In tandem, these procedures targeted the single tumor remaining on my liver. The conditions for the procedures were ideal: Tumor markers well within the normal range since my surgery last February -- in fact, wholly undetectable since May; no circulating tumor cells; all metabolic and blood labs normal (actually, really good). No other tumors apparent in scans. And we found out on Friday afternoon, the two procedures resulted in a 98% reduction of the single tumor. The remaining viable tumor after the procedures was described by my Interventional Radiologist as a "sliver" about 5mm in length (still along the hard-to-access crest of the liver -- snuggled against my diaphragm).
This result led my doc to recommend we repeat the two procedures with a slight nuance (no chemo delivered in the embolization) in short order with the goal of extinguishing the last detectable sign of cancer. It's like my surgeon said last winter, doctors like to go for it when the cancer is on the run. So, when? Well, the second embolization is in two days (12/10), and a week later, the second ablation (12/17). It will all be done before Christmas (at this rate, it may outpace our home renovation (ha!)).
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| Definitely feels like solid footing on the right path. |
The best news is that during the two-plus months since the procedures began, there are no signs of any new tumors . . .. It is looking like this holdout may be the last. So yes, we're dancing to Pentatonix holiday tunes these days.
As with every step along this path, there are no guarantees . . .. Still, my optimistic heart is following the signs of hope, encouraged by what we've accomplished so far. And I'm sure I hear the heartening, lyrical and ghostly voice of my dad whispering (from the front seat), "Buddy, we are nearly there!"
Quote of the Day:
“Remember how far you've come, not just how far you have to go. You are not where you want to be (yet), but neither are you where you used to be.”
~Rick Warren
Progress Update:
- As of 30 November, I'm off my targeted therapy drugs until at least 28 December. After 15 targeted treatments (same number as chemo), I have strong signs of drug toxicity. Dr. Rixe assured me this is a good time for what he describes as a "real break," since my markers are good. Dr. Rixe is big on "pushing the envelope" -- so big in fact that Cliff once challenged him, asking if I am the envelope. At this point Dr. Rixe said he was surprised I was able to stay on the drugs for eight months . . .
- On 28 December, when we reconvene, I may or may not restart targeted therapy. There is a chance Dr Rixe could be transitioning to a quarterly approach to watch my progress -- more to come on that.
- In just the week since I came off of the drugs, some range of motion is returning to my arms . . . and with a little finessing, I can dress myself (yay!).
- On Sunday night (three nights ago), we slept in our own room/bed for the first time in four months! Seriously, the reno project is wrapping up . . .
- I'm continuing my modified Mediterranean diet with an extra dose of healthy fats to stay in ketosis. I'm continuing massive supplements as ordered by Drs. Hooper and Winters. I'm up to 20 mg of mistletoe therapy (and better all the time about those shots in the gut). I'm continuing IV Vitamin C at 50 grams once a week. I'm on a 31-week Peloton streak. I continue to meditate and benefit from energy work. And even though I have yet to jump in our freezing pool, I am into cold showers (Thanks, Wim Hoff). I guess all of this says that I'm continuing a fully integrated approach to our fight -- all supported by Dr. Rixe who continues to say, "Something is working. Don't change a thing."
- This week Cliff celebrates a birthday -- actually I think it is mostly me who celebrates his presence on earth and in my life. He is a gift to me. Every. Single. Day.
- And lastly, the new puppy is due to be born at the end of the week. Puppy energy is heading our way this spring.
- Yep, we got this! So grateful for where we are, for who you are and your support. Thank you.
VIA FRANCIGENA!
