"A what? Oh gosh, I haven't even been looking." Cliff's question brought my mind back to the trail. How long had I been walking in mindlessness? How much trail time had I lost while burrowing deeper and deeper into my own mind, and drifting further and further from the present?
 |
| Sign at the bottom of the Grand Canyon |
Ah, signs! They bring us back to the trail -- to the present moment. A mountain flash on a tree confirms our way. A distance marker assures our progress to destination. Signs give important safety information, mark our elevation and advise on essential services. Best of all, they nudge us back to full awareness when needed -- even their absence can be a wake up. How long has it been since you've seen a sign?"
 |
| ~Thich Nhat Hanh |
Our job is the travel with our eyes open wide looking, and with our ears tuned in and listening (really listening), for the signs. They are there -- when we are.
Even the Unexpected Journey has signs -- both subtle and posted.
- For direction: Low white blood cell count directs a chemo vacation.
- For safety: The addition of Neulasta and dropping the Fluorouracil bolus to safely resume chemo.
- For grounding: The words of Thich Nhat Hanh for daily mediation and my daily practice of presence.
And as Cycle Six began (yesterday) we got a progress sign. Really our first feedback on this journey that informed us of the effectiveness of my treatment path toward kicking stage four (advanced) colon cancer to the curb. And the news is good -- really, really GOOD! The treatment has stopped cold the progression of my fast-growing cancer. There are NO new lesions or masses on my liver. All previously identified lesions and masses are reduced in size or GONE. The affected lymph nodes are cancer-free and there is NO compromise of my liver function. The largest, and first, tumor in my liver has shrunk in volume by more than 50% (leading us (a direction sign) toward a local measure for a cure -- surgery, ablation, cryotherapy, etc.). We are so grateful! Grateful for this news. Grateful for our community of support. Grateful for the love of family and friends. Grateful for the luck, blessings, opportunities and choices afforded us. Grateful for signs. We trust the process. We are trekkers. We are warriors. We keep moving. We believe. We love our lives - Every. Single. Day.
Progress:
- For now, we stay the path with chemo/targeted therapy. Re-scan early in 2020.
- Our consult with the hepatic surgeon is in coordination.
- I hit and surpassed my 21s for Cycle Five (logged 30 miles -- although weather drove me to the Peloton Cycle for 12 of those miles). I made it to base camp -- Marty is home and we got to catch up (so thrilled for the achievement of this trekking hero).
- I'm still regaining to my pre-treatment weight at the end of each treatment cycle.
- As outdoor walking is no longer an option (hyper-sensitivity to cold), and mall walking is getting questionable amid holiday crowds and flu season -- a treadmill is inbound (to be delivered next week -- I am beyond excited!)).
- And this month, we are dancing to Christmas songs -- Every. Single. Day. So joyful!
Quote of the Day:
If there is no struggle, there is no progress.~Frederick Douglass
Bonus Quote:
We don't have to see the whole road ahead of us to assure that we're going in the right direction. We take it in stride by staying positive, having faith, and maintaining that vision of happiness.
Sometimes I obsess over trying to control the circumstances and wanting to always know the outcome, but the truth is, it is created all along the way. We aid it by our choices.
The guidance is there. As soon as we take that single first step in the direction of our Destiny, signs are posted all along the way. All we have to do is keep our eyes peeled! If you want your life filled with abundance, be grateful for what you have. When you realize how abundant your life is already, you attract further abundance.
 |
| Exercising the brain in the chemo suite yesterday -- Treatment Cycle Six |
VIA FRANCIGENA, 2020!
No comments:
Post a Comment