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On what we would characterize as a "normal" TeamBoltz trek, we've always had the luxury (and fun) of extensive planning. We've enjoyed our training (all the while working toward a ready-to-trek confirmation goal). We've enjoyed pre-trek cultural immersions of reading and research that enliven our journeys. Landing on the trail mid-stride on our unexpected journey means we hopped past those actions. What we haven't, and don't have to, skip are the multitude of incredible opportunities and rich experiences that every journey guarantees, when we are aware and noticing. One of our missions, therefore, is to step into the opportunities and revel in the experiences available on our unexpected journey by leveraging the power of presence.
For sure, the absolute unknown (assumed to occur at some point in the future) of the unexpected journey taunts the imagination with distracting, vacuous daymares -- hungry to be filled anxiety and fear. We see the shadows. We recognize the seductive pull. We even have days when we walk the rim of the void. Resisting that oh-so-scary place is not as simple as, "Don't think about it," (a surprisingly recurring encouragement).
We have a little magic, though, that keeps us on our path when we are plagued by sinister musings that beg us to stray from our path of strength and determination. To remain (and at times to return) to the present moment, where we can relish in the highlights of the unexpected journey, we sometimes have to create a highlight opportunity to kick-start awareness. Being aware and noticing the beauty and goodness of life is is our soul-quenching reminder that we cannot truly live in any other moment but this moment (so why go there?).
Every trek has its highlights -- those in-the-moment experiences that are so demanding, engaging, and joyous, that they leave no space for pain or doubt or regret. They are unique in their power to fill the spirit and steel the muscles, neither teasing a future outcome, nor begging a step into the past. These highlights inform a way of being that is energizing, strong and positive. I think we all have these highlight experiences. I also believe our visceral knowledge of them (more feeling than recollection) can empower our awareness and keep us solidly present to live them fully. These highlights are, for me, prized imprints that release a flood of endorphins, refresh my knowing and prompt my battle cry: "I'm here! I can do this!"
A few such TeamBoltz trekking highlights come to mind:
- The four-limbed scramble up the Barranco Wall en route to our Kilimanjaro summit (exhilarating!).
- Meeting a kid (goat) on our descent from the Gosiankund in Nepal (so innocent and fearless it was).
- Our first view of the ruins of Choquequirao in Peru (in 2008, still mostly undiscovered by trekkers).
- Reaching Robin Hood's Bay at the end of Wainwright's Coast-to-Coast (Oh the celebration . . . and our immediate thought, "Let's not stop walking.").
- And one of my personal favorites -- bungee jumping off the Karawau Bridge in New Zealand (one incredible swan dive into full presence).
So wonderfully, on Tuesday evening of this Week Two, (the night of the full moon) Cliff and I created an incredible highlight experience when we chose to log our routine three-and-a-half mile walk (along the dirt road that rings a significant portion of our equestrian neighborhood where street lights are nonexistent and dark sky lighting rules prevail) along a path illuminated only by the moonlight. Along the way, in the moment, we were rewarded by the sound of wing beats that drew our gaze to the silhouettes of two owls passing just over our heads. We marveled at the changing night shadows playing off the ridge lines, pinon and juniper as the moon cleared the horizon and headed high into the sky. Hushed by the quiet of the night, we were fully alive, charmed and charged by the magic of the moment. The present powered us forward, far from the void of the known. Had our minds been crammed with fearsome worry, the preoccupation no doubt would have delivered a very different (mindless) experience. This conditional shift (from daylight to moonlight for our walk) created a highlight that anchored us in the present. What we could know fully (and choose to embrace) in the moment was the mindful moon walk -- a highlight experience ON our path, which we chose not to miss.
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| Santa Fe Full Moon -- Perfect for Moon Walking |
Listen, it simply would not be truthful for me to suggest that the unknown (rimmed with fear and anxiety) does not loom larger for us on some days than others. In truth, that can be every minute of every day for any of us, whatever the journey. And we (each of us) can choose to acknowledge the unknown, without diverting to its shadowy fork -- lined with rows of gremlin worry and goblin foreboding. Creating highlight opportunities can super boost awareness, which then powers us along so that we don't miss the sights, smells, sounds, tastes and touches of today. Noticing, creating, rejoicing in our very present experiences, fortifies our ability to stay true to our path (and ourselves). The future will no longer be the future when we arrive. And worrying about the future at the expense of today is a waste of the moment -- the only moment -- in which we are truly alive.
Progress Report: Week Two of Cycle Four is coming to a close. It has been an active and enjoyable week filled with friends, reading, cooking, exploring, dancing, and walks (I'll exceed my 21-mile cycle goal and I've met my 21 minute daily exercise goal -- Every. Single. Day.). I'm heading into Treatment Cycle Five strong and positive. Tomorrow, we meet with our super-hero oncologist. Round five chemo begins Tuesday.
Quote of the Day:
Whether it is the best of times or the worst of times, it is the only time we have.~Art Buchwald
Bonus Quote:
Because I'm not giving up! I'm here and I'm stayin'!~Kermit the Frog
VIA FRANCIGENA, 2020!
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